Barack Obama beefs up crotch security after Jesse Jackson threat

Democratic candidate Barack Obama has agreed to start wearing an iron-clad chastity belt on the campaign trail after the Rev. Jesse Jackson was heard saying he wanted to cut Obama's nuts off.  Secret Service deputy director Calvin Orosto, who also served under President Bill Clinton, says:

"We take all threats very seriously. The iron chastity belt is the best protection we could find on short notice to protect Barack Obama's testicles. His balls are now are number one priority and we're not going to let anyone get close to them.  We tried this device on former President Clinton for other reasons, but he was able to pick the lock."