BRITNEY SPEARS SUES OVER PHOTOSHOPPED CROTCH SHOT

Britney Spears has filed a $50 million lawsuit against paparazzi agency X17 Online for Photoshopping a fake pair of panties over the singer’s exposed crotch in a photo that shows her getting out of her car while wearing a mini-skirt. “Seriously, I think the American people have seen enough of her vagina,” said X17 Online editor Susan Preston.

The photo, which has been posted on several celebrity websites and published in a handful of magazines, shows Spears with her legs spread apart as she slowly gets out of a car to go into a Shakers restaurant to use the restroom.

Spears released a statement after the lawsuit was filed on her behalf in Los Angeles Superior Court seeking $50 million in monetary damages plus legal expenses and asking the court to issue an injunction ordering X17 and other websites to take down the covered-up crotch shot.

“We cannot let the media distort the truth,” said Spears. “I was shocked and appalled to see a photo of myself with a pair of panties on my vagina. I’ve never seen these panties before, and I only own like two pairs.”

But Preston defends her decision to paste the fake pair of panties over Spears’ private parts, saying, “We could have easily put a blue dot over her crotch, but we thought we’d be a little more artistic with it. Hers is the least attractive vagina we’ve seen in all of our years covering celebrities. We still want to post her photos, but we had to do something.”

However, media ethics experts are questioning the tactics of X17 Online.

“The job of the paparazzi is to capture celebrities as they are and not to manipulate the photos,” said Professor Michael Swinlock of Webster College. “Now, if we start pasting fake panties on Britney Spears, then that creates a slippery slope. Pretty soon we’d see photos of Lindsay Lohan with her firecrotch all covered up. I wouldn’t want to live in that kind of a society. Would you?”

Despite the X17 photo fracas, Spears says she is determined to keep getting out of cars while wearing extremely short dresses.

“Those photos showing me with the fake panties on has embarrassed me and my family,” writes Spears. “I have two children. They’re going to have to go to school one day and other children will ask them if that was her mom on the internet wearing a pair of panties. I’ll have to explain to them and say, ‘No. You’re Mommy’s vagina was exposed in that photo. The bad paparazzi people covered it up.’”